Circle of Life

My Nana and Grandad

I have meant to update my blog for a while now, however the intricate threads which form the beautiful woven tapestry of my world seem to be giving the cloth of 2013 some chaotic characteristics, and the rhythm of life seems faster than ever these last couple of weeks.

My Granddad passed away short of a week before his 93rd birthday. He was a connection to my father, whom he out-lived by nearly eleven years. He was also a very special Grandfather. To me, he was magic personified. My love for him was deep, and I respected him greatly. As you would expect, he had been through a lot in his nearly 93 years, as a prisoner of war, and as a family man. He undoubtedly had his fair share of heartaches. He was a survivor and full of life until the end. Keeping busy with different social events, he had only given up driving a couple of years ago. He was determined to get out of hospital and to return to his home and visiting my Nana in a home. However, the day before he died he was told that he had an inoperable tumour in his stomach and the next day, while sitting with my Aunt, he shut his eyes for a rest and took his last breath, like he intended on keeping things civil and not fighting with life.

I feel lucky to have received his legacy of love. Although losing him feels like losing valuable treasure. Those stories I tried to frantically write down or etch in my mind to retell to my children. Real live accounts of World War Two and much more. What an honour it was to have him into my adulthood, as well as all the magic he brought into my childhood. Only a month before, he asked me for my opinion on what happened, if anything, after life. This surprised me as he was scientific to the core. I don’t believe in having regrets, but I wish someone could have told me and I understood, when I was younger and had all of my grandparents, just how valuable an old person truly is.

Three days after his funeral, and also exactly on the 11^th anniversary of my father’s departure from this earth, my sister brought her first child into this world. Generally, I accept anniversaries as part of life, but this date now seems somewhat significant. I knew that she was going into labour. I felt a connection with her like never before. I had the same buzzing rush of adrenaline that I experienced with my own labours, and I even texted her at midnight to tell her so. It seemed I could feel the tension of this most primal and transcendental moment ripple through the air across the countryside from her home city to mine.

I thought I had experienced it all after having my own babies, but what an emotional experience it is to see your sister bring a child into the world. There have been many happy days since. Cooing over this tiny little being and not wanting to miss a minute of my beautiful niece.